My name is Ruth and in December of last year I gave birth to my daughter, after a drawn out stressful pregnancy due to illness and lack of care from the nhs system, here is my story.
February 2006, and after a few months of myself and my partner trying for a baby the month had finally come when the pregnancy test showed the two pink lines o say I was pregnant. We were both thrilled and overjoyed at the news of our forthcoming adventure, but little did we know at this point what problems we would encounter and stress that would be caused due to the ever increasing problems of the shortage of midwives in our health system. At the beginning of my pregnancy I immediately became ill and started suffering with pain and discomfort which at first was thought to be an ectopic pregnancy. At this point I must state that my care was good with the first doctor I saw, I was taken to hospital and given a thorough examination which resulted in me having to go to a second hospital to be seen by gynocologist. At this point things started to change almost immediately and I was left with my partner in a ward with no one attending to us. After a while a nurse came to take bloods and ask me various questions about what was wrong with me and fill in my files. I was in a lot of pain and in a state as I was petrified I was losing or going to loose my baby, whereupon when my blood had been taken the nurse left me with a canula in my arm and we weren't seen by another nurse for hours on end.
As time went on my partner kept asking for someone to come and see me and help as I was still in pain and needed examination, and in the late evening a surgeon came along to examine me and didn't know what was wrong so left me again. I was left until very late at night whereupon I was then told that there was no gyny that could see me so I had to either stay or discharge myzself not knowing whether my baby was alive or dead. I was told to come back on Monday morning when they did scans as they didn't run them at the weekend!
This seemed to be the roller coaster start of events to unfold of the lack of care and trauma I had to endure throughout my pregnancy. I started to see a wonderful midwife, who I was thrilled with and at my second appointment I walked into the room to find a second midwife who told me the midwife who had attended the surgery for years was ill, and she was taken over. I accepted this until at every appointment I attended I started to see more and more midwives and eventually it progressed to where I in total saw at least 20 different midwives!
This proved to be disconcerting and worrying and although I kept stating to each of them how unwell I felt during my pregnancy not one of them listened as they simply didn't have the time to listen and as soon I was in the assessment room I was out. It resulted in me having to stop my work early and basically being slave to my sofa and television with my partner running around after me as I was incapable of walking, eating properly or living to any substancial degree.
My daughter was due in december and the weeks leading up to the big day I attended my surgery every week to be seen by a midwife and to have my stomach pulpated to check the position of my baby. At each appointment I was told my baby was lying with the spine agaisnt my left side and was in perfect position for labour. I kept telling them that I was sure she was not as I received all of my kicks in this area, but not one listened and I even had one midwife who was so rushed that her hands were filthy, she stank of cigarette smoke and pulpated me so harshly and violently that I ended up going home in pain and cramping.
When the big day finally came it became apparent from the onset that I was not going to have a simple and structured labour. My waters broke at 3am and continued to break until 7am at home. At this point I received my first contraction and the pain was astronomical. I couldn't believe that this could be a normal contraction and demanded to see a midwife immediately as they stated they did home visits. Upon the first phone call to the hospital my partner was told that they were sure it was just normal labour and to hold on and they couldn't come out yet, I was left to stay at home with a tens machine for relief! A while later I was screaming and in total agony, my partner phoned the ward again and eventually demanded a midwife come and they did. This particular midwife was wonderful although found it particularly funny to her colleague on the phone, as she believed I was just making a fuss, and couldn't deal with pain at all!
Upon examination she realised that I was in fact in very early labour at only 2cm dilation and that the pain wasn't normal for this stage, she then felt the baby and saw that she was in the wrong position where her back was lying agaisnt mine and so the friction upon each contraction was to much to bare. I was told I couldn't be given pethadine at my local hospital as they refused to give it until someone was at least 4cm dilated and so begged to go to my next hospital where they may consider giving me some pain relief! Upon arrival, I was told I couldn't have pethadine for a while so was given gas and air but the pain was just to much and I was in agony and couldn't cope at all. After a few hours they finally gave in and gave me pethadine, which helped me greatly although didn't wholley take the pain away. I was left with my partner and a midwife came very occassionally as they were so incredibly busy with other admissions. We were left with screaming all around us due to people not wanting pain relief and others being told there was no surgeon to give pain relief!
After many hours I was given another shot of pethadine, again after begging for more help, and eventually I was taken to another room with a different midwife. I kept stating the pain relief was not substantial and I needed more help, I begged for more help and I was told continually that the chances of me having an epidural were incredibly slim as they didn't have enough surgeons to come to the ward. I was hysterical and this went on for many hours more with continual gas and air. I became so distressed that my body slumped into trauma and I picked up and infection, whereupon I had to be given an antibiotic drip to help. When this ran out I was given a top up into the canula and it was agony, but they refused to listen and carried on injecting it into my skin. It turned out the canula was not positioned correctly and had caused trauma to my vein.
After 18 hours I was given a second drip to speed up my contractions and still the pain continued. Eventually after begging a surgeon did become avaliable and I was given and epidural. The first one was given and it hit a blood vessel so I then had to go through the procedure again. This helped alot although I was given a low dose so still went through some pain and alot of pressure. Eventually my midwife stated I was ready to push after an aggressive internal. I started to push with all my strength and nothing was happening, this carried on and after an hour my baby became distressed, and the monitor was stating she was tacky cardic and in trouble. I was crying and audibly distressed my self, and eventually a gyny came in to assess me. She stated that the midwife was wrong and I was not ready to push at all as my cervix had not gone. I was horrified, and this lead to the saying I should stop pushing for an hour and then carry on after that and a furthur internal.
As this went on it became increasingly apparent that things were not going to plan and as well as myself my baby was not going to come out without help. I had internal after internal and my daughters head was continually being turned so to move her position. When the gyny came back in after a while she stated I should still continue to push and when I screamed that I could not and needed a ceasarean I was told that this wouldn't be possible and basically under no circumstances would they consider a ceasarean as they believed that what I was experiencing was just normal childbirth! After 24 hours it was apparent that I was not going to be able to push my baby out, after all I had been already pushing for at least 2 hours an nothing was happening. I asked for more help and eventually was given an assisted delivery with forceps, which was traumatic and uncomfortable. This resulted in many stitches after an episiotomy and I was left in total shock and trauma.
After the birth, I had a very rushed bed bath and was told to try and go to the toilet in a bed pan which was shuvved under my bottom. I told them over and over I could not go and still they left the pan under me with excrutiating pain from my stitches. Eventually I was taken to the ward, and my partner was not allowed to come in with me as it was in the early hours of the morning. I was told where the toilet and wash room was, not that I took any notice as I was still under a lot of anesthetic and then wheeled to my bed, whereupon I was told to get into it. As I rose from the chair my legs fell beneath me, of course, my legs didn't work due to the epidural, but I was given little help. My baby was left on her plastic crib at the end of my bed and I was left in agony lying alone crying.
After an hour I couldn't cope with the pain from my episiotomy any longer and called the bell for help. After about 20 minutes a nurse came and stated there was little they could do for me but I could have a suppository, which I obviously declined or my only other option was paracetamol which I took with no result at all. I asked if there was any kind of ice pack or freeze spray to help but the nurse laughed at me and stated that paracetamol was the only option I had!
A couple of hours later and my baby started to choke in her cot, she became blue and as I tried to help her I was unable to still move my legs and was trying to drag myself using my arms to where she was put. This became increasingly impossible and I rang the bell, no one came for at least half an hour and although I eventually managed to put my fingers in my baby's mouth to rid her of the mucus in her throat I couldn't lift her and a midwife then arrived to help. She picked her up and started to pat her but was disgusted with me that I was unable to do it myself!
I needed the toilet desperately and with no one helping me I tried to get up where upon blood poured from me onto the floor and I couldn't reach my bag to clean it up. I was mortified and eventually managed after half an hour of manipulating my body in various positions got some maternity pads to clean it up. I was left on the bed with urine and blood leaking from me and no one to help me to the toilet. I had no option but to call my partner who had only 2 hours sleep and asked him to come and get me a I had to leave this place. Before he arrived my drip ran out yet again and I rang the bell to no avail. When a nurse came an hour later she forced antibiotics into the canula and again it was excrutiating. She eventually asked if it hurt when I had been crying in pain and took it out.
The experience continued in a bisheveled and hurried manner with no care or help. My emotional state was laughed at and I was told that it was just labour so I should pull myself together, when I cried furthur the nurse walked out of my bay. My partner and I stayed all of the rest of that day and I received no help with breastfeeding or pain. He helped me attend the toilet and clean me up and not one nurse came to see me throughout the day. We were totally left with only the builders decorating and sawing next to my bed as company. Eventually after a lot of trouble and argument I was allowed to discharge myself and home we went where the care I received from my partner was unprecedented.
This is my experience of childbirth and it turned out to be the most horrific experience of my life, one which has now left me with various aliments and severe mental health issues including depression, post traumatic stress and anxiety. I have written this blog to speak to others who have been through a similar experience and need help and support from thier births of their children.
